ABNA Expert Reviewer

What is the strongest aspect of this excerpt?

The novel is written in an authentically southern voice and the writing is very rhythmic and engaging. The first scene is immediately compelling and engaging. Teddy’s character is very human and likeable, and his observations of the adult world are astute. The writer does an excellent job of bringing to life an important segment of African American history for young people. The inhumanity of the Jim Crow laws is highlighted well both in the hospital scene and in Teddy’s heartbreak that he can no longer play with his childhood friends now that he is 12. Showing the unfairness of this magnifies the impact. Humor is used in a subtle and judicious way and the writing often sneaks up on the reader in a pleasantly surprising fashion. The scene where Teddy lovingly calls his mother a “serving wench” is simply hilarious.

What aspect needs the most work?

The beginning of the story, while very gripping, was a bit overly graphic and this may be off-putting for some readers. It was a bit unbelievable that in the wake of his child being seriously injured, the father stopped and took time to dig up the offending rock and throw it into the water.

What is your overall opinion of this excerpt?

This was a very strong excerpt with an endearing main character that brings to life the meaning of being African American in the Jim Crow south. Teddy is a bit reminiscent of Huck Finn and is a character that readers can easily relate to. Showing the world through his eyes makes a powerful impact.